Hi, and welcome to Telefem! It’s so nice to meet you! If this is your first time here, we want to tell you that you’re in a safe space, full of trust. We are here to answer all your questions and provide you with trustworthy information regarding safe abortion in Mexico. Let me introduce you to one of our articles, and if you still have questions, feel free to contact us through WhatsApp!
In this blog, we want to apply “listen to, don’t judge” with abortion. We must see it through empathy and respect for others’ choices and rights. When we support people who have decided to have an abortion, it is of the utmost importance to ask ourselves, how can we support them? What can I do for them without making too much trouble? We will help you to answer these questions down here:
The Empathy Gap: What We Claim to Know vs. What We Truly Understand
Empathy is the ability that helps you to understand and share the different feelings and emotions of other people, perceiving them from your own.1
Empathy it’s not an ability you simply just born with; it is something we can learn as we grow, we must exercise it every day and its primary function is to promote and allow coexistence in society; for example, understanding strong or complex emotions like anger will help to recognize if a colleague at work or school, is going through a rough time. This way, you can support them sincerely.1
It’s said that empathy is walking a mile in someone else’s shoes, but honestly, this is not even possible, because we didn’t experience the same situation as the one we mean to support. This will always be the case because we are unaware of the full context of the person. We can honestly look at emotions we may have experienced before and try to understand them to connect with their feelings and help them when they ask us to.
Respect, understand, and do not judge abortion. Why?
Providing proper care during the abortion process is crucial, as some women and who chose to abort may be from a violent background, or heaving negative emotions influenced by the morality of their surroundings; support from empathy allows them to experience this process safely, informed, support, plus taking care of their psychological and emotional well-being.2
When people are stigmatized for having an abortion, they often feel shame, guilt, and even a sense of disgrace, even tragedy. This situation can trigger complex feelings of loneliness or mortification, which interfere with their process, blocking them from getting support or resources that could help improve their current condition. Many women who choose an abortion experience these feelings because of the judgment of their community, their family, and close friends.2
Now you see the significance of providing safe abortion with:
1.- Respect. Because we recognize the right of every person to decide about their body and life, that’s the autonomy over their own body of women.
2.- Empathy. Understanding different contexts that make stories and experiences unique and diverse also helps us appreciate the abortion choice. Therefore, all our support, whether emotional or psychological, and information, is free of stigma.
3.- No prejudice. Social, family, or institutional judgment can be the beginning of a path full of discrimination, obstetric violence, and rights transgression. Promoting a judgment-free environment allows people to seek safe, blameless, but fundamental medical care on time.
Approach a place that does not judge you for having an abortion, as it is part of understanding reproductive rights from a well-being and health perspective. At Telefem, you’ll have access to remote medical guidance from specialists who never question your choices or try to change your mind.
No two stories are alike: the unique humanity behind every safe abortion
Sometimes we think our perspective is all we have for facing life, and sometimes others have the same perspective, but that’s never the case; each of us has a social context, family, and many other things that shape us into the person we are today. Each person is unique, so the reasons that lead them to make choices. There are many reasons why women could decide to terminate a pregnancy, which most of the time can be grouped into the following categories:3
1.- Sexual violence. Just in Mexico, 94% of sexual offenses were not reported, so we can just imagine or have a vague idea of how many are committed every day. This means that for every report of rape, there are almost nine others that happened but were not reported.3
2. Lack of access to health services—sounds crazy, we know, but this is a real problem because people don’t have a clinic nearby or something as simple as a pharmacy.
3.- Difficulties in the correct and consistent use of contraceptives, because some are tricky, or other causes can lead to their use.
4.- Failure of contraceptive methods. Even permanent methods have a failure risk (0.5% for tubal ligation and 0.15% for vasectomy), so unplanned pregnancies will continue to exist despite access to contraceptives, even though you chose a permanent method.
5.- Because they are exercising their reproductive rights.
Whatever the reason for choosing an abortion, it’s key to remember that we can’t and we mustn’t measure that choice with our tools and experiences, since we’ll be invalidating their experience. Instead of making judgments and criticizing her choice, we need to try to understand their story and resources, and if our help is needed, be there for them in the most respectful way possible.
Telefem is a nonprofit organization that supports your choice not to become a mother. We want you to receive the safe and specialized support you seek.
Empathy: do’s and dont’s when supporting a person who chooses an abortion.
Abortion is already seen with negative social stigma, which can lead to difficulties with this process. That’s why when someone approaches us for help, they fully trust in our ability to support them; they are not asking us to choose for them or tell them what to do, and maybe not even our opinion on the matter. Remember, if you want to show affection and support, the ideal is to respect their choices even if you disagree with them.4
The people, organizations, and social resources surrounding women that can help them exercise their rights are known as support networks. These networks can provide emotional support, such as listening, physical care, or a simple conversation. They can also offer instrumental support, such as financial, material, informational resources, or access to health services.5
This support makes us feel loved, cared for, appreciated, and valued as a part of an honest, caring group. Support networks are fundamental for everybody; we all have a support group, among friends, at work, because they positively influence and help make emotional healing much easier.5
Regarding the abortion process, many studies give us some insight that the experiences change when we have support, companionship, and we have access to information, shared experiences with us, and reviewed different alternatives that reinforce reproductive rights.5
So if you want to support someone who has chosen to terminate a pregnancy, you can do so in the following ways:4
Before the abortion: gather all the information you can about where and how to carry out the procedures; remember, they are not silly questions, help the patient to access the resources needed to ensure the procedure is not risky.
During the abortion, be there, listen to the emotions that may arise during the process.
After the abortion: discuss the topic if the person wishes or needs to, help them seek more information, and even a contraceptive method, always if they want to.
If you need remote medical attention and professional advice for a Safe Abortion, Telefem connects you with specialists; contact us via WhatsApp.
A safe abortion should never be done in uncertainty or isolation. Staying in communication with trained professionals makes all the difference. That’s why Telefem is here — to guide and support you from start to finish.
Send us a WhatsApp today — we’re ready to help.
* This content is for informational purposes only and does not replace professional medical advice.
References:
1. Facultad de Psicología UNAM. Empatía, “pegamento social” que permite conectarnos con los demás. [Internet]. 2022. [Visit in April 2025]. Available at: https://www.gaceta.unam.mx/empatia-pegamento-social-que-permite-conectarnos-con-los-demas/
2. Rodríguez-Falcón M y Quijada-Mata L. 2022. El acompañamiento como estrategia contra el estigma social hacia las mujeres que abortan. Revista de Ciencias Sociales. 2022;2(1):1-21. [Internet]. [Visit in April 2025]. Available at: https://iberoforum.ibero.mx/index.php/iberoforum/article/download/207/618?inline=1
3. IPAS Centroamérica y México. ¿Por qué abortan las mujeres? Qué dice la evidencia sobre las causas y razones del aborto inducido. [Internet]. 2021. [Visit in April 2025]. Available at: https://ipasmexico.org/pdf/IpasCAM-2021-PorqueAbortanLasMujeres.pdf
4. Balance, et al. Mi hija, mi hermana, mi prima, mi amiga, mi novia… ha decidido abortar. Folleto. [Internet]. [Visit in April 2025]. Available at: https://redcompafeminista.org/recursos/mi-hija-mi-hermana-mi-primami-amiga-mi-novia/
5. Ortíz O, et al. Acompañar para empoderar: Guía de apoyo para la formación de acompañantes a mujeres en situación de aborto. [Internet]. 2010. [Visit in April 2025]. Available at: https://clacaidigital.info/bitstream/handle/123456789/613/guia-acompanamiento-aborto-final.pdf